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Texan's Guide
to a Happy Life:
1. Never kick a fresh cow chip on a hot day.
2. There's two theories to arguin' with a woman. Neither one works.
3. Don't worry about bitin' off more than you can chew. Your mouth is
probably a whole lot bigger'n you think.
4. If you get to thinkin' you're a person of some influence, try orderin'
somebody else's dog around.
5. Never ask a man the size of his spread.
6. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he started
roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot him.
The moral: When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.
7. If you find yourself in a hole the first thing to do is stop diggin'.
8. Never smack a man who's chewin' tobacco.
9. It don't take a genius to spot a goat in a flock of sheep.
10. Never ask a barber if he thinks you need a haircut.
11. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes
from bad judgment.
12. Always drink upstream from the herd.
13. Never drop your gun to hug a grizzly.
14. If you're ridin' ahead of the herd, take a look back every now and
then to make sure it's still there.
15. When you give a lesson in meanness to a critter or a person, don't
be surprised if they learn their lesson.
16. When you're throwin' your weight around, be ready to have it thrown
aroun by somebody else.
17. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier 'n puttin' it back.
18. Always take a good look at what you're about to eat. It's not so important
to know what it is, but it's critical to know what it was.
19. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it over and put it
back in your pocket.
20. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
More About
Texas:
Click on a selection:
Our State Song
Our State Flag
Our State Flower
Live Cameras of Texas
Live Camera Links of Texas Online From Lubbock to Brownsville; From El Paso to Lufkin;
From Abilene to Witchita Falls; and all of Texas in between, live cameras as we speak.
Scenery, weather, traffic, novelty, and just John Q. Somebody's office in downtown Big D, or Ms
John Q's office at UT Austin Campus; variety in a Texas way. You pick the camera.
Some Texas Humor:
Joe Bob say:
"Beauty is only skin deep....but ugly goes clear to the bone."
We say:
"You know it's gonna be a bad day when you wake up and the only
bird singing outside your window is a buzzard."
Note: We'll be adding more Texas
humor. Please check back now & then!
Click on the Armadillo to hear some "Texas Hoedown" music !
The Texas Aggies:
What would Texas do without
the Aggies. They've got a great school that I'll admit is a good as "THE University." Locally they are some of the best guys
and girls in Alice, Texas ..... I came across the following link I just have to pass along:
How do you keep an Aggie busy on the
internet? [ Click
Here For Answer ]
An
Important PS for You Aggies: After you click above for the answer and want to
get back to our mcintyreonline.com "Texas" page, remember
to use your "BACK" button at the top of your browser !
Alice Texas Exes:
Check out a web site I
designed for the Alice Texas Exes at: www.Alice.TexasExes.org
The Dallas Cowboys:
Check out their official
web site at: www.dallascowboys.com
Check out
Abilene, Texas:
"A great town in Texas and
home of the best in-laws in the State!" Robert
To find out more about where Patrice is
from, Check out the web site for Abilene,
Texas.
The contents of this page were borrowed or stolen
(not rustled, mind you) from within the great state of TEXAS
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